Doctor Who: How Did Osgood Survive?

Yeah, a bit obvious, but sometimes the simplest solution is the correct one...even if that 'simple solution' involves traveling back in time to before Osgood was killed. As Moffat boasts, "In a show about time travel, anything can happen." If it is a case of simply going back in time to pre-death, the Doctor is unlikely to save her outright – paradoxes and all that. The situation might be similar to his relationship with River Song, when he knew all along that she was doomed. Bummer.

Let's call this the 'Ozgood' theory, probably the next most likely and also hinted at in Moffat's statement. Let's quote: "The brilliant Ingrid Oliver is back in action. This time though, can the Doctor trust his number one fan?”

Right, remember the 50th anniversary special, the Day of the Doctor? The one with Matt Smith, David Tennant and John Hurt in it? Among the myriad goings-on in that episode was an invasion by the shapeshifting Zygons...through 3D paintings because Gallifrey Daleks Peter Capaldi eyebrows. Or something.

Anyway, at one point a Zygon starts imitating Osgood and is really mean to her. Then later in the episode, in order to broker a peace deal, the Doctor wipes everyone's memory so humans and Zygons can't remember if they're humans or simply Zygons pretending to be humans.

Perhaps the Zygon's memory never came back, and she has been living as Osgood since then. Perhaps, with the original human Osgood dead, Ozgood is only now recalling her origins, a kind of sleeper cell. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps.

Now don't laugh. This is the RadioTimes.com pet theory, because it's both ridiculous and founded in Doctor Who lore, the two things that get us up in the morning.

As with the survival of Missy, ‘vaporisation’ special effects are nice and vague and are often revealed to be a disguised teleportation. You only have to think back to the episode Time Heist for an example: those suicide pills actually transported the Doctor’s gang to safety.

It is possible that Missy’s strange smartphone/weapon is a modern update of the Master’s old Tissue Compression Eliminator. This used to shrink victims down to doll-size through “matter condensation.” An improved version would presumably mean better shrinkage. Could a tiny, subatomic Osgood still be alive and well, living in Missy’s iPhone?

These are the questions that need answering.

Look, she's not, but let's dispense with this now because we know someone is feverishly tapping this theory into a Doctor Who forum.

Essentially: Clara isn't just Clara, she's every Clara. It's all in her. In order to save the Doctor from the Great Intelligence in the Name of the Doctor, she scattered herself throughout time, constantly cropping up in the Doctor's life and saving him from danger. Every time she had the same face, but her names varied slightly. The Clara we know best has the surname Oswald. The very first version of Clara the Doctor met (well, sort of, it's complicated) was called Oswin Oswald. And Osgood is called Osgood, which is a bit like Oswin/Oswald.

It should be noted that this theory is wrong. Clara may have changed names, but she always had the same face. (Except when she was a Dalek, but let's not get into that). Ingrid Oliver and Jenna Coleman do not have the same face. QED.

Nope. Just nope. She may dress up as her favorite Time Lord, but she isn't one herself.

Osgood's sister is mentioned in the Day of the Doctor. Apparently she considered her sibling 'prettier', but Osgood has always had a bit of an inferiority complex. It's possible that this sister is a twin, and as Osgood is a surname, she would also be called Osgood. This theory gets extra points for sounding like an off-cut from a Dallas episode.

Moffat moves in mysterious ways. For every time the fans guess where he is going (Missy/Master) there are a thousand moments of 'huh'? Yes, maybe Osgood is a ganger clone, or trapped in Gallifrey's pocket dimension, or a hitherto unseen pre-regeneration of the Master, but the reason for her return is more likely to be something completely new.

All we know for sure is we're glad Osgood is coming home.