Weirdness Level Quiz

Good morrow, dear stranger.

Mornin'

No. no. no. no. no. no. ye-no. no. noooo.

AAAAAAAH!! HUMAN CONTACT!!!!

Like my dog I will...
Puppy, say "hi"

Hiya, friendo I just met.

Bye.

Can't talk now, important stuff going on. I have life insurance and a lot of powerful friends. I'm GOING. back off already, geez..

Oh, what. Thanks, but I have other plans.

Oh, yeah. I met you at that...thing.

Cool, but I can pay.

Sorry, I only drink tea...My dog likes coffee though! Puppy, accept his offer.

Coffee is like the embodiment of my soul. It's what I ask for my birthday each year. Only I never drink it. I only like tea. So, yeah.

I don't recall that. You're not on my contact list so either I have a doppelgänger or you're dead to me.

NO! STRANGER DANGER! THE DARK LORD IS UPON MEEE!

Oh, yeah. I know them, we're close.

Any friend of your mysterious brother is a friend of moi!

How many strangers do you know, stranger?

Sure.

Guess how many times I can say no to that idea? Spoiler alert; seven...hundred...and a GAZILLION. Times 0.

No way, they are too cool :(

Is that wise? Their minds are fuzzy, and the force is showing no clear path.

Well, I am usually serious but sometimes fool around with friends.

That depends, who's asking?

That's my business. Not yours. I don't care if you're this guy's brother, so bleh.

I am Monkey Man. I'm here to steal your brains!

Oh, I'm a friend/peer of this guy here. We met a while ago at this cool event. It was really fun, trust me. How about you?

Um, sometimes? I thought we'd split up... I don't know :(

Yeah, but I don't have my own car yet. It's sunny, let's walk.

Oh, I flew here.

Sorry, this is where it ends. AVADA KEDAVRA! MWA HA HA!!

Why would you drive when we are literally only going two blocks? I walk or bike. If it rains, I commute or car pool. So, no.

Let's just take my pony. I am a famous horseback rider, you know.

Pull over, I need it for my collection.

EW! It's DEAD!!

Cute! I hope it's not dead. Wanna know the 100 most commonly known snake facts?

Run it over, lunch is best served smooshed.

So? It's not in our way. Keep going.

(Lie) Nope, never heard of it. Keep driving.

THIS ISN'T HAPPENING!!! NOOOOO!

No worries, I'll put it out. I never leave home without my fire putter outer.

Quick, let's all spit on the flames!

I'll call 911, we better back up the car, that's a lot of smoke. Everyone stay calm.

A hippopatomaous

My house is burning, and that's your first thought?

My fairy godmother.

It's an angel coming to bring us to heaven. The fire killed us.

The only cloud I care about is the kind that will rain. That one won't be putting out any fires.

Duh!

I'm not!

I know you are, but what am I?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Look, Pusheen in a tutu!

I have better things to do than listen to your criticism.