Which WashU Sculpture Are You?

Basically, you were a hipster long before being hipster was even a thing. You are not afraid of being who you really are. Just like The Bunny, formally known as “Thinker on a Rock,” you march to the beat of your own drum and contemplate the difficult questions that society doesn’t want to confront. [Society gif] Your individuality shines through, making you a the type of genuine person (or bunny) that people want to hang out (and take pictures) with. Obviously, your unique and fabulous sense of style is envied by all, making you the most famous student (or statue) on campus.

Just like the “Swamp Creature Friends,” you know how to have a good time. Your senior superlative in high school was probably “Life of the Party” and rightfully so. Their neon green bodies glowing throughout the night, Swamp Creature Friends never stop turning the hell up. While some people are calling it a night, you are just getting started (party gif) A key feature of “Swamp Creature Friends” is how these three friends are all matching and physically connected to each other, showing that they are an exclusive and tight-knit group. Of course, you and your friends are the definition of squad goals and are the center of attention at every party.

I’m sorry girl, but you’re pretty basic. Fortunately, most of us basic bitches have been aware of this for quite some time. Like “Places” we often seem like we blend in with the crowd. We joke about having a wardrobe that seems nearly identical to our best friends’, but maybe we just never grew out of wearing matching outfits with the squad back in elementary school. [Mean girls gif] At a glance, the nine pieces that make up “Places” seem nearly identical, only differing in shape. However, if you take the time to actually look at them individually, you will see that each one has a unique and beautifully designed mosaic pattern. So take that haters. If you took the time to get to know us (and properly appreciate our outfits,) you would see that we all pretty damn special. Places is just art, it is considered to be a “functional work.” The different shapes surfaces cut out on each of them can be used as a place to sit, read, drink a PSL, and most importantly, sleep. Basically us basic bitches are actually super complex multi dimensional. I mean, it’s a series of nine stones titled “Places.” That’s pretty deep if you ask me

You’re a natural born leader. When you see something that is about to go horribly wrong, you do not hesitate to intervene (and thank god for that.) [Kourtney gif] You trust your gut and make the cut throat decisions that no one else can make, (like which picture to Insta or what the hell you and your friends are being for halloween.) You tell it like it is, which sometimes gets you into trouble, but your intentions are always good. You don’t take crap from anyone. I mean, just like at that pose. He looks like back-up dancer for Beyonce god damn it (or someone who led an amateur army to defeat one of the world’s most powerful and the founding a country, I guess.) That level of sass and confidence can only come from someone with your insane amount of wisdom.

You’re the mama bear of your friend group without a doubt. Basically, you’re probably the world’s most supportive friend and teammate. Just like these bears, you got your besties back.While you’re cute and sweet on the outside, you go on full attack mode on anyone who does your friends wrong. Nobody messes with you. [Blair gif] If someone needs advice, a shoulder to cry on or just someone to validate some totally life-changing decision they made, you are their go-to girl. Also, you show your school spirit like no other. Both on and off of the field, you generate enthusiasm that hypes even the most angsty and sleep deprived pre- meds. [Hoops gif] Game day is your favorite day of the week, even if you’re not playing. Rain or sun, you will still go out to cheer for your friends and be the loudest one out there. Epitomizing the name, Standing Tall, you take personal offense when your relatives ask how you are liking “University of Washington” at Thanksgiving (it’s in St. Louis dammit.)

Let’s be honest here, you’re the friend that makes everyone else look inadequate. You’re the annoyingly perfect model student that we all aspire to be. Your ability to juggle your classes along with your extra curriculars can only be explained by Hermione Granger’s time turner or some genetic mutation where you do not need sleep. {Leslie knope gif} This sculpture, Ainsa I, hangs outside Olin Business School, so you know that they are smart. While simultaneously studying, Ainsa also greets people as they enter the building. Similarly, the only thing that rivals your unexplainable scholarly abilities is your sweet and caring personality. You are always ready to help us lesser humans understand Calculus better than Khan Academy ever could. [Elle Woods gif] This sculpture consists of a whole bunch of letters, that is lowkey probably a game of scrabble for all those SAT vocab words that you forgot the second you finished shading in your final bubble. Yeah, you and Ainsa probably use those words on the reg.