People Share The "Wrong" Ways To Eat Certain Foods And It's Hilarious

My sister is a freak of nature and she eats her banana kind of like corn on the cob.

She will peel the banana halfway and then scrape the sides with her teeth making it shiny and then she would eat the center remains. I think she should have been put up for adoption.

I will say she’s smart enough to not do this in public, she does this in the privacy of being at home where her family can shame her

Pamplemousse96

Once I had a substitute teacher just drink an entire bottle of steak sauce.

One go. In my personal opinion, there is no right way to consume steak sauce, but that man found one of the worst. Seeing it slowly glug-glug-glug down his throat, its pure viscosity making each swig a concentrated effort, was absolutely horrifying.

I never wish to see something that unpleasant again.

subteach

My friend from the middle east made dolmas for a mutual friend of ours.

She dropped them off and then left. Not knowing what they were, he peeled the grape leaves off and ate the inside. I tried to tell him he was supposed to eat the whole thing, and he didn't believe me.

When she found out he ate them that way, she got really upset since she spent all that time rolling the dolmas only for him to just eat the filling.

levelingdaredevil

I had a friend in High School who would eat a taco in the most peculiar way that I am at a loss to easily describe.

He started by taking a huge bite out the top middle, then he would eat the little flaps around his bite mark and take another bite out of the middle and nibble off the edges again.

When all the lettuce, tomato and cheese parts were gone and it was just a little tortilla boat of meat he would just eat that all in one go.

I should mention that the last I heard about him there was speculation he was now working for the CIA...

Gliph88

My (very anglo) grandparents came to visit when i was 5, and took me and my sister out to eat at our favorite "Mexican" restaurant. We all ordered tacos, hard shell.

They proceeded to cut the tacos with a knife and fork. I proceeded to exhale chewed up tacos out my nose because i couldn’t stop laughing.

huzzam

My cousin once insisted this was correct when confronted on it.

Fill bottom of bowl with a generous helping of Parmesan cheese.

Thrown on a pile of hot, freshly cooked spaghetti spaghetti noodles.

Dump some cold sauce out of the fridge on top.

"That's the whole point, the mix of hot and cold. And you can scrape up cheese with every bite."

I also once had a neighbor who ate "ketchup soup". It was ketchup poured into a bowl and eaten with a spoon.

SvenHudson

My ex-Grandfather-in-Law was a retired officer and served as a dentist. The first time I met him he offered me a cup of coffee. I was very nervous meeting him, he was a very well established man and he meant a great deal to my ex so I was focused on making a good first impression. I accepted his offer and he made me a cup of coffee how I liked it, black, and handed it to me.

I was about to take a sip and he said ‘Wait!’, he went and grabbed a straw and educated me on the horrors of what hot coffee hitting my poor teeth does and the immense damage to the enamel it caused.

So, as to not be rude, I shotgunned steaming hot coffee to the back of my throat via a straw for the next 20 minutes while we talked. Had a burn for the next 4 days in the back and roof of my mouth.

beastgunner

You’re not supposed to take a bite of a piece sushi and then put it back down on the plate. You have to either stuff the whole thing in your mouth or hold it until it’s finished. If you put it back on the plate in front of the chef they take it away.

I think this is a hardcore Japanese traditional rule but that’s what I was told at a legit traditional Japanese sushi restaurant in SF.

Edit: Yeah I don’t know what to do with an oversized piece of sushi either, but I have a big ass Steve Tyler mouth so I usually just go for it.

BabyParmesanHead

There is a dish in China(/Chinese restaurants) called XiaoLongBao, which is similar to dumplings except with thinner skin and soup inside.

XiaoLongBao is supposed to be steamed and eaten when it is still hot. You are supposed to bite a small hole on the skin and suck the soup first.

A very common wrong way to eat XiaoLongBao is to put the whole "bao" inside the mouth, and then discover the extremely hot soup exploding inside your mouths the moment you bite down... It is a pretty painful experience.

astralwannabe

So I am not a huge fan of shrimp. I think they are big bugs and I hate the stupid poop vein thing. One time I got taken out for work to a seafood place, and someone ordered some shrimp. I decided I'd try to be open minded and have some shrimp and stuff.

Well I ate some of the shrimp and it was even grosser than before. AND IT WAS CRUNCHY.

I find out later that shrimp prepared this way have shells and you are supposed to take the shells off before you eat them.

I was not amused.

So my answer is, eating shrimp with shells still on.

Starrie0880

I once took a trip to Panama City Beach with my high school ex and her dad, and of course one of the common delicacies there is shrimp.

So we go to this high end place, sit down, and the waitress comes to take our orders. I order the shrimp, as I have never had shrimp other than the shitty fried stuff served in a high school cafeteria.

Hence, I never learned that you're supposed to take off the shells before eating the shrimp.

So, my first thought is "Man, this is crunchier than I thought, but whatever, must be the gourmet stuff." I'm two shrimp in when ex asks me how it tastes, to which I tell her my surprise regarding the texture.

She, being from Florida, gives me the most confused, what-the-fuck-do-you-mean kind of look before confirming that I did not take off the shells, after which she busts out laughing and tells me my wrongdoing.

I was mortified in the moment, but laughed it off later with her.

zaubereixmc1

I worked at a fresh seafood restaurant on the coast...yes it really was fresh. Guy would come in and order peel and eat shrimp.

Sit at the same table for 8 hours and eat those shrimp legs, shell, and all. He would only drink one glass of sweet tea in the entire 8 hours and not tip.

This is so wrong on so many levels

Got caught following a waitress home and got banned from the place.

swahine1123

I'm from Australia, went to Vegas and hit up a nice restaurant.. when i walked in i saw two people eatinf their pizza with a knife and fork and was like wtf this is weird.

I better follow them. So I did, the waiter comes up and goes "do you guys always eat like that? Seems weird eating hand held food like that.." I was shamed and I agreed

plagueisthedumb

Pizza: I usually leave the crust along with a crust-sized amount (give or take) of pizza attached to it still. Then I'll eat that from the side until there's a bite of crust and a bite of pizza left, and from there I'll eat the crust bite then the pizza bite.

I'm not sure when or how I came up with this method, I had to think about it to even describe it, but I guess this is the best way I'm able to keep the crust around for as long as possible (to hold it easily) while still tasting "pizza" last.

I just don't feel like managing a whole slice without a crust, it's a little annoying. I used to just not eat crusts at all as a kid, but I don't completely hate them anymore.

Walpurgisyacht

I have a friend who likes eating lemons so much her dentist had to beg her to stop eating them. She refused to stop entirely, but compromised and reduced to only one lemon a week.

She did at least peel them, but I've been in awe of her citrusy fortitude ever since.

smatterdoodle

I'm Thai. I was at a Thai restaurant near Dallas, Texas and a white lady next to me asked why I wasn't eating my Thai food (beef salad and white rice) with a chopstick. I had to inform her that Thai people traditionally only use chopsticks for noodle dishes. The rest of the time we are using forks and spoons like Westerners.

severus_snapshot

The right way to eat a hoagie is to unwrap one end and commence devouring, rolling the wrapper down to expose more sandwichy goodness as needed. Why unwrap the entire thing and taint the bread with your filthy peasant hands while the toppings fall out everywhere? Eat it like a lunch push-pop, you dummies.

usernamedmistaken

I mean I used to like peanut butter. Age 11 I experiment with peanut butter in porridge. 24, not eaten it ever since that awful, awful day. Sometimes my brain recalls it and I retch. It didn't just taste bad, it made a substantial part of my soul leave my body. When my parents divorced, it was comforting at least to know that I'd bounced back from worse things than this.

Fuck me, it was bad. Christ.

Palladium369

Try eating food as a western person in an asian/middle eastern country.

My wife is from India and her family all looked and kind of smirked at me at dinner time the first time I visited. Things like eating food with a fork and knife that the rest of them eat with their hands in a very efficient practiced way, to little things like westerners mixing everything on the plate together into a big pile as opposed to eating things in a specific order.

Ive grown to eating components of a dish separately these days, but I’ll stick to the silverware.

ArmoredMirage

Went on a first date to a bbq joint. Instinctively, I ordered ribs. Didn’t dawn on me for a few minutes that this girl was going to see me with sauce on my forehead if I ate with my fingers. Briefly debated using a fork and knife to eat them cleanly. Paused for a moment, looked her in the eyes, and said, “you’re about to see some disturbing shit” as I bit into that first rib with sauce all over my face.

We didn’t have a second date.

ThreeTo3d

My daughter used to think you pick up pie and eat it like pizza. We don’t eat pie much so it had been a long time since she’d had it and she picked it up out of the pie plate with her hands and started munching away. Very cute, but she was embarrassed when I asked her to get a plate and fork lol

CrankyKitty69

Putting the ice cream in your mouth and warming it up and then spitting it back into the bowl and repeating until all the ice cream is melted and warm. Then whip all the mouth melted ice cream and eat it like whipped cream on a spoon.

shmogan

My youngest brother peels the cheese off pizza and toppings, eats them, then eats the slice.

One time we were at a pizza place and he did it in front of the owners(Italians from New York pizza joint) and one the guys was like “WHAT THE FUCK MAN?!?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?” Followed by screaming in Italian. lol I’ll still never forget it. Reminded me of the Seinfeld episode with the calzones where the guy kicks out Kramer after kicking out George and slams his hands on the table. These two dudes lost it after watching my brother eat pizza like a freak. They didn’t kick us out but they calmed down and then were telling my brother “this how you eat it” The fold... basically the New York way.

brotherjackdude85

Not a food, but water. I see. So. Many. People. Drink water from water bottles, by ONLY sucking, not letting any air in, which makes the bottle crunch down. Did no one ever teach them how to drink from a bottle? I wonder how they do it when it's a glass bottle. Let air in while drinking, wtf is wrong with you Neanderthals lmao

DorrajD

One of the duties of being an upperclassman at West Point is teaching the plebes how to eat in public. Theoretically, any one of the cadets could go on to be a high-ranking general who has to interact with heads of state and other powerful people. So tact and etiquette are important to learn, even when you're a freshman at a military academy.

During "Beast Barracks" (cadet basic training that happens when you first show up at West Point), I had one plebe. He was big guy, probably bound for the football team. On the first night that we had pie for dessert, he started to eat his piece with a spoon. I was aghast.

"Cadet Pierce!" (not his real name, which I don't even remember)

"Yes Sir!"

"What are you doing to that pie?"

"Uh, Sir I'm eating this pie."

"With a spoon? Pierce, do you eat pie with a spoon at home?"

Pierce thinks about it for a moment and then replies in a thick Kentucky accent, "No, Sir! At home we eat our pie with our fangers!"

hendergle

In the army reserves, I once saw a man make a coffee in his mouth. Yes you read that correctly. He couldn't find a mug and didn't have the time to boil up some water, but was desperate for a caffeine fix. So he opened up his gob, poured in a sachet each of coffee powder, sugar and milk then attempted to stir it in his mouth. It seemed more like a thick sludge as it seeped out of the corner of his mouth, but he still gulped most of it down. Utterly revolting and I told him so.

Flyingpoliceman

Spaghetti. For some unknown bewildering reason, most people I meet insist on swirling noodles into a fork and placing the fork into their mouth. I do not understand people like this. Just be normal and slurp each noodle up in a straw like everyone else

Edit: did not expect people to actually believe your supposed to use forks and knives to eat food. Visit my profile for a picture of the proper way to eat most foods. Have a wonderful day

whatisausername32

Eating a hamburger upside down - this has caused many a family fight, half my family eats it with the top bun (sesame seed side) up, and others eat the burger with the top bun facing the floor (they flip their burger somehow) and say it’s the proper way to eat it.

glitterstixa

I once saw a women on tv eat a hard taco, by using the shell as a vessel to transport the food to her mouth, then using her hand to shovel the food through the taco shell into her mouth. Just seemed so unnatural, like she’s never seen a taco before.

walt708

This is one of our hobbies at the high school cafeteria table! Including but not limited to: apples from the top down, bananas like corn, peeling bananas all the way before eating them, eating foods that should be consumed with a fork by using a spoon and vice versa.. I can go on.

eelllliioott