How Would You Get Detention In The Breakfast Club?

You messed with the bull; you got the horns.

Malcolm Raines
On Nov 21, 2015

How did/do/will you and your high school best friend spend your free time?

What did you bring for lunch?

Did you show up to school on time?

Did you get along with the guys at school?

Why are you sad?

What are you rebelling against?

What do you want to listen to?

What was that ruckus?

Think about this carefully. Are you running away from something or running towards something?

A naked lady walks into a bar. What is she carrying?

Choose a talent.

You breached security.

You breached security.

You are usually such a good kid. An egghead, really. No one expected you to get caught with that...what was it? A pen knife? Box cutter? Gun? AK-47? Whatever it was, if I catch you running around the hallways with your new friends in a comical, Keystone Cop fashion, I'm going to go in there and start cracking skulls. Don't test me!

You bullied someone.

You bullied someone.

What are you? The school jock or the class clown? Not laughing now, are you? Look buddy, I know how you got here. You think that bullying people younger, smaller, or hairier than you is funny, and sure... sometimes it is. But it is also very wrong. Where are you going to be in five years? Still taping butt cheeks together? Taping butt cheeks is no way to go through life, son. Straighten up and fly right.

You pulled the fire alarm.

You pulled the fire alarm.

You think pulling fire alarms are funny, do you punk? You know who doesn't think it's funny? The good folks at the fire department. Hmm... What was that? Are you being smart? Well I've got news for you, Buster Brown, I've got you for the rest of your natural life... every Saturday at 7:00am. If you don't like that, you can just take a swing at me. Go ahead. I would love it. Take your best shot.

You cut class.

You cut class.

Oh, so you think you don't belong in here because you cut class to go shopping at Bloomies with your fancy friends in your fancy convertible car? Think again, Princess. You think you are so special, well guess what? If I come in here and catch you putting on make-up with your cleavage or causing a ruckus or smoking funny cigarettes, I will end you. Capisce?

Nothing...

Nothing...

Listen Missy, I don't know who you are or how you got in here, but now that you're here, I want a 1,000 word essay on who you think you are. And by essay, I mean ESSAY. I don't want the same word repeated a thousand times. Hmm? What's that? Did you just say something or did you just make a weird noise? You're a basket case, aren't you? I've got my eye on you. Straighten up.