What's Your Inner Old Person's Name?

Let's face it. You know you're an old soul. You know you're crotchety at heart. But now it's time to get into the nitty gritty and find out that your inner old coot's name!

Earl Gray
Created by Earl Gray
On Sep 27, 2017

There are a couple of kids playing on your lawn. What do you do?

Which of these decades would you have wanted to be your heyday?

Do you believe that it is possible for a route to school to be uphill both ways?

You walk into a soda parlor. What do you order from the jerk?

What do you think of cars?

Choose a word to describe your love life:

What is your favorite Elvis song?

Pick an elderly hobby:

Gladys

Gladys

Your inner old person is Gladys. Gladys has lived a whole lot of years, and she can tell you EXACTLY what's wrong with you, the way you're living your life, the way you're folding your laundry, and the way the world is going. You know what your problem is? Gladys does. Do you think Gladys is your inner old person? Talk to us about it in the comments below, and share with your friends to see who their inner old person is!

Eugene

Eugene

Your inner old person is Eugene. Eugene is pretty hard of hearing, so he's often surprised when you take him out to get Thai for dinner instead of taking him to get fitted for a new tie. Eugene has learned to go with the flow because when your hearing sucks and your memory does to, every day is even more full of surprises than the last. Do you think Eugene is your inner old person? Talk to us about it in the comments below, and share with your friends to see who their inner old person is!

Harold

Harold

Your inner old person is Harold. Harold is a bit of a ladies' man. Anything goes with Harold. He may not be able to go swing dancing like he used to, but any walk on the beach is a long one when your walker keeps getting sand jammed in its wheels. And romantic dinners? As long as you like milkshakes, you're sure to have a terrific time with Harold. Do you think Harold is your inner old person? Talk to us about it in the comments below, and share with your friends to see who their inner old person is!

Bertha

Bertha

Your inner old person is Bertha. Bertha has seen some shit, so she's always prepared to fend off a physical attacker with her cane or a verbal attacker with her vast vocabulary of swear words she picked up during her time in the Navy. You do not want to mess with Bertha. Do you think Bertha is your inner old person? Talk to us about it in the comments below, and share with your friends to see who their inner old person is!

Norman

Norman

Your inner old person is Norman. Norman is only as old as he feels, and trust us, he does not feel old. Norman spends just as much time or more in the gym as those young whippersnappers and can bench press them under the table any day. Until his back goes out, that is. But a few little spasms aren't going to be enough to keep Norman down for long. Do you think Norman is your inner old person? Talk to us about it in the comments below, and share with your friends to see who their inner old person is!

Rhoda

Rhoda

Your inner old person is Rhoda. Rhoda is a free spirit who never quite came back from Woodstock. This hippie grandma is only as old as she feels, and while she's certainly an old soul, she's always been young at heart. Maybe it's all the weed, but she's always been chill and will want to listen to as many of your stories as she will regale you with hers. In short, Rhoda's a good hang. Do you think Rhoda is your inner old person? Talk to us about it in the comments below, and share with your friends to see who their inner old person is!

These are 10 of the World CRAZIEST Ice Cream Flavors
Created by Tal Garner
On Nov 18, 2021