Which Alan Partridge Scene Sums Up Your Year?

You're probably thinking your life is nowhere near as sad as Alan's, but it is. Sorry to break it to you. Now take this test.

Dan Murphy
Created by Dan Murphy
On Nov 14, 2016

Pick a secondary I'm Alan Partridge character

Now choose your 2016 theme music

Have you been treated in hospital this year?

Which of these is you right now?

What of these Partridge quotes would you put in your Tinder bio?

Have you made any new friends this year?

Pick an emoji to sum up your year?

Which most closely represents your drinking habits this year?

Lynn, these are sex people!

Lynn, these are sex people!

You've had a crazy 2016 filled with new people, unique experiences and the odd bit of debauchery - possibly involving a kitchen magnate, or some chocolate mousse and a Travel Tavern. You've lived 2016 at 100mph and might want to cool it a little in 2017 because you've found yourself in some extremely awkward situations this year.

Needless to say, I had the last laugh

Needless to say, I had the last laugh

You've really 'bounced back' this year and had your most successful, hilarious, and eventful twelve months for some time - and you want to shout about it from the rooftops. You feel invincible and on another level to your peers. Lovely stuff - not our words, the words of Shakin' Stevens.

I've pierced my foot on a spike

I've pierced my foot on a spike

Well, 2016 was a bit of a car crash wasn't it? Bet you can't wait to start again in the new year. Tell you what, why don't you throw on some Terence Trent D'arby, cocky man from the '80s, to help you relax in a deep bath and forget it ever happened? Just remember to keep that pierced foot elevated.

There you go, as ordered, one cup o' beans and I've put a sausage in an' all

There you go, as ordered, one cup o' beans and I've put a sausage in an' all

You've had a pretty uneventful year, except for that wild afternoon when you went to B&Q to buy some tungsten tip screws you'll never use. Maybe try to get out more in 2017, there's a cracking owl sanctuary nearby. Or how about the Spice Museum in Longstanton - apparently their cafe does a fantastic 'savoury 99'.

I now have the third best slot on Radio Norwich, I have a military-based quiz show on cable television called “Skirmish”, and I’ve got a girlfriend

I now have the third best slot on Radio Norwich, I have a military-based quiz show on cable television called “Skirmish”, and I’ve got a girlfriend

You've had another great year, everything has fallen well and truly into place now, and your career is taking off into the stratosphere - plus, you've traded in your Mini Metro for a Rover 800. Cashback. Kiss my face. Back of the net!

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