Can We Guess Which Board Game Ruined Your Childhood?

Once upon a time, you knew nothing of money, nothing of greed, nothing of what competing businesses could do to tear your family apart. Then came Monopoly, which pitted you against your best friends and even your own parents, who mercilessly crushed your little hotels on the brown spaces while you barely kept your head above water. The good news is that it prepared you for the crushing reality of job hunting and student loans, little Miss Ashley.

When you were a child, you thought you could be anything you wanted to be, didn't you? Well, guess what. The Game of Life is here to tell you that your education determines your career options, and even those will be limited. Oh, and kids? Those don't happen for everyone, and when they do, they cost five thousand dollars per head to send to summer camp. Then they put you in the nursing home when you can't drive any further. Have fun living with that knowledge, little Suzy.

Remember when you thought you could fly? Lol, no. Mousetrap is here to teach you all about the laws of physics. One wrong move, and the whole machine breaks down, and guess what? The same applies to cars and humans, not just plastic mice and Rube Goldberg machines. But on the bright side, you also have a working knowledge of how to get rid of the vermin that will inevitably invade your terrible apartment, small Robert.

Every mom wants the best for her kids and wants them to become doctors, lawyers, people who make money and will be able to take care of her when she ages. But guess what, kid. Your hands are too shaky to even operate on a paper dude with tennis elbow, let alone an actual human being. Way to disappoint your mother from an early age, young Mary. Way. To. Go.

You could have had a beautiful, carefree childhood were it not for the Game of Ladders and an Overdeveloped Sense of Justice. Oh, you took an extra cookie from the kitchen? CHUTE DOWN TEN LEVELS. Yep, Chutes and Ladders exists to let children know how terrible they are and that they deserve to finish last. So, you better clean up your act, little Marvin, or you'll end up in the downward spiral that is the minor mistakes of adult life compounding into alcoholism.

Congratulations. You got off easy. The closest thing that brought you to a ruined childhood was your fear of Lord Licorice turning into a distaste for actual licorice, which is actually just a major bullet dodge. We hope you have fun living your sugar-coated life, young Andrew.